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Old August 3rd 05, 03:26 AM
KØHB
 
Posts: n/a
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"b.b." wrote

It just ****es me off when they make claims of
intentionally sending code so poorly that a
pimply-faced No-Code Tech with a code
reader can't listen in.



Give it up Willy Weeper. "They" (a single guy) who said that is long since dead,
but you keep writing jeremiads on a topic that no living soul remains to
support.

And why is it that you continue to hijack my satirical character, Billy Beeper?

beep beep
de Hans, K0HB

(Apologies to Kurt Vonnegut)

To all external appearances, Farnsworth Corners, U.S.A., is bright, cheerful,
and happy. However, in dark corners of the city lurk Godless Nocoders who seek
to undermine the moral fabric of our mighty Nation.

In a dirty basement apartment, an underfed, seedy-looking old man wearing small,
round spectacles and threadbare clothes, types furiously at a musty desk
illumined only by a single, naked bulb. As the pages fly through his typewriter,
an evil plan gradually emerges: a treacherous treatise which threatens the
well-being of the upright citizens of Farnsworth Corners. The work is completed,
and the old man leans back thoughtfully and smiles as he rubs the three-day
stubble on his chin. The time has come for the Hammer of Leonard to strike!

Some weeks later, in another part of town, little Billy Beeper walks home from
school. Suddenly he hears a voice right next to his ear.

"Psst! Hey, kid! Would you like to try my 2M HT? It's free!"

Billy's eyes open wide as he faces the stranger. An embroidered patch on the
mans soiled jumpsuit reads "Codefree Charlie". "Gosh, no! N2EY told me never to
touch a radio which didn't beep!"

"Aw, c'mon!" says the old man. "I only wanna be friends with you!"

"Well, I don't know," replies Billy. "I was told that FM was bad for you!"

"That's just what the grown-ups say to scare you!" says the drooling man.

"The truth is that they don't want you to try it 'cause it'll make you grow up
faster and be able to smoke cigarettes and drink liquor just like them!"

Billy is hesitant, but suddenly a tall form looms before them and grabs the
ruffian by the collar.

"Golly!" exclaims Billy. "It's Captain Code!"

Yes, Readers, it's Captain Code: faster than a Vibroplex Blue Racer, more
powerful than an Alpha three-holer, able to leap tall pileups in a single bound.

"You should be ashamed of yourself, old man," says Captain Code to the hoodlum.
"There are far better ways to earn money than to hoodwink innocent children into
a life of codelessness. It's to the FCC for you!

"And as for you, young friend, take my advice and stay away from strangers, and
believe nothing that they say. It's tragic, but until Godless Nocodism is
abolished from the world, there will always be those who would like nothing
better than to hurt you ."

"Gee, thanks, Captain Code!" says Billy. "I promise that I'll always listen to
Mom and Dad, and I'll keep away from strangers with shacks on their belt!"