Wired one for most things. Plug a discreet earphone

Or get stereo walkman earphones, and tap your toes and snap your
fingers, they'll never guess. A phony walkman dangling from your neck
completes the picture. Or dress the scanner up as a walkman. A mono
earphone here would be a dead giveaway.

Older non toe tappers can dress up as a sports fan with an old AM
radio clipped to their belt but the actual wire to the ear would be
coming from the scanner, whilst the scanner is hidden in a
pocket. Here we use an old white mono earphone.

When the authorities come, slide the whole mess in your pants. the
rubber ducky bulge is no problemo; "After the operation I was left
with a permanent `boner'", you say. But as you have unfortunately
dislodged the earphone jack, you are cut off by a gruff "1 Adam 12 see
Mrs. Nurdsbury about stolen napkins, over" emulating from your
trousers.