Are you one of those single, never married, never raised a family, nothing
to do after work (do you work?) but just try and preach to everyone else
what they should think (thought police?) and how to raise their families
(socialist-communists?).
And tax every hard working family to death so you don't have to pay a red
cent for social services and welfare which you likely enjoy.

"David" wrote in message
...

As news spreads that teens who pledge chastity have lots more kinky
sex, millions of aging boomers ask: Where was Bush when I was in high
school?

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By Bill Maher



April 1, 2005 | New Rule: Abstinence pledges make you horny. A new
eight-year study just released reveals that American teenagers who
take "virginity" pledges of the sort so favored by the Bush
administration wind up with just as many STDs as the other kids.

But that's not all -- taking the pledges also makes a teenage girl six
times more likely to perform oral sex, and a boy four times more
likely to get anal. Which leads me to an important question: where
were these pledges when I was in high school?


Seriously, when I was a teenager, the only kids having anal
intercourse were the ones who missed. My idea of lubrication was
oiling my bike chain. If I had known I could have been getting porn
star sex the same year I took Algebra II, simply by joining up with
the Christian right, I'd have been so down with Jesus they would have
had to pry me out of the pew.

For a bunch of teens raised on creationism, these red state kids today
are pretty evolved -- sexually, anyway, and for that they can thank
all who joined forces to try and legislate away human nature,
specifically the ineluctable urge of teenagers to hump.

Yes, the "What do we tell the children?" crowd apparently decided not
to tell them anything. Because people who talk about pee-pees are
potty-mouths. And so armed with limited knowledge, and believing
regular, vaginal intercourse to be either immaculate or filthy dirty,
these kids did with their pledge what everybody does with contracts:
they found loopholes. Two of them to be exact.

Is there any greater irony than the fact that the Christian Right
actually got their precious little adolescent daughters to say to
their freshly scrubbed boyfriends: "Please, I want to remain pure for
my wedding night, so only in the ass. Then I'll blow you." Well, at
least these kids are really thinking outside the box.

There's a lot worse things than teenagers having sex, namely,
teenagers NOT having sex. Here's something you'll never hear: "That
suicide bomber blew himself up because he was having too much sex.
Sex, sex, sex, non-stop. All that crazy Arab ever had was sex, and
look what happened."

Well, that's our story -- of how faith and the party of smaller
government combined to turn your kids into a generation of
super-freaks. Which shouldn't be surprising: Prohibition didn't work,
"Just say no" didn't work, and I understand there's a host of
Americans who illegally obtain and smoke marijuana. They're the ones
who've been giggling every time I say anal sex.


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