.... that almost makes me miss the ancient drums my
great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-etc. ancestors used to
use to communicate with in the primordial jungles... I wonder if we
could bring those back to?
... perhaps require the new licensees to beat out a fancy tempo on one
of those turkeys before we gave 'em a license!
evil-grin
Warmest regards,
John
"Jim Hampton"  wrote in message
...
 "KØHB"  wrote in message
   ink.net...
 by Bob 'Dex' Armstrong
 In the old gravel-gut boat service, your only link with the civilized
 world was
 via the radio shack. A cubby hole on Requin aft of the scope wells in
 the
 control room... It was the home of the spark shufflers.
 If you were in tight with a radioman, you could get ball scores.
 Sewer
 pipe
 sailors lost touch with the teams they followed... A hazard common to
 submarine
 sailors and people who take a moon walk and miss the ride home.
 Actually,
 we
 lost touch with just about everything. In the war movies when they
 come
 across
 some guy who claims to be an American, they ask him questions only an
 American
 could answer. If they had picked me up and asked me anything but (A)
 The
 names
 of Roy's and Gene's horses (B) Who won World War II and (C) Blaze
 Starr's
 bust
 size, I would have been one 'up the creek' sonuvabitch. Hell, we
 didn't
 know
 Jack Kennedy was the president until we snorkeled a day later.
 Only a complete idiot would make a bet with a radioman. Chances were,
 the
 radioman had the final score before you tossed your wampum on the
 mess
 table.
 I remember one great night brought to us by the spark pushers in the
 radio
 shack.
 We had finished whatever nonsense they sent us out to do and were
 making
 turns
 for home. The Old Man opened the showers... Guys were bumming razor
 blades
 and
 rooting around in side lockers for something that would pass for a
 towel.
 Next
 thing you know, the foo-foo juice came out. Now there's a myth that
 all
 smoke
 boat sailors eventually bought into, sooner or later... Aqua Velva
 was
 never
 meant to disguise poor personal hygene. No matter how much of the
 stuff
 you
 poured on a dungaree shirt you had been inside of for two weeks, you
 were
 still
 one disgustingly foul smelling sonuvabitch. You could spray French
 perfume
 on an
 engineman with a fire hose and buzzards would still circle around the
 *******
 when he went topside. But I digress...
 A group of us were sitting around in the crew's mess drinking coffee
 and
 ragging
 guys heading fore and aft. A radioman came in and told us we were in
 for
 one
 helluva good laugh. He monkeyed around with the RBO and patched it
 into
 something in the radio shack.
 For those of you who never had the pleasure of riding diesel boats or
 other
 seagoing steel-hulled garbage scows, I must explain something here.
 You could make phone calls from a ship at sea. Here is how it worked.
 The
 radioman would raise someone ashore called a 'marine operator'. Then
 the
 radioman would give the marine operator the name and phone number of
 whoever the
 bluejacket aboard ship wanted to call. The marine operator would then
 place a
 collect call and when the party answered and accepted the charges,
 the
 marine
 operator would form a radio link with the ship and 'Bill the
 Bluejacket'
 could
 talk to his sweetie.
 From sweetie to the marine operator was private and confidential...
 From
 the
 marine operator to Barnicle Bill, it was up for grabs... Great
 evening
 entertainment.
 "Poopsie, is that you?"
 "Yes ducky doo, it's me."
 "You miss me, peach blossom?"
 "Oh yes... YES, darling!"
 "Miss me a lot?"
 "Oh, I miss you soooo much I can't wait to hold you and..."
 "Okay darling... Are you going to meet the ship?"
 "No sweetheart, I parked the car in the pier head lot... Keys are
 under
 the
 mat."
 "Why aren't you meeting the boat, sweetheart?"
 "Oh, it was supposed to be a suprise... If you must know, the kids
 are
 spending
 the night with the Webbers. I bought a new nightie and I figured we'd
 break it
 in tonight."
 The animals would cheer,
 "LET'S HEAR IT FOR MAMMA AND HER NEW NIGHTIE!!"
 And so it went. Bluejackets phoning in after six months in the Med...
 Great
 entertainment.
 "Darlin' can't wait... Just you and me and a can of Crisco!"
 We heard it all... It was great... Laugh after laugh. A very
 memorable
 evening... Best and cheapest fun we ever had on Requin.
 There were times... Moments that we took for granted and that passed
 with
 little
 notice. It's funny how they come back late in life when you have the
 time
 to
 reshuffle your memories... The collected moments that constitute your
 life.
 Radiomen linked us with the world. Another thing we just took for
 granted
 and
 that was so damned important looking back. Never thanked them...
 Should
 have.
 Great guys, all of them.
 Hello, Hans
 You should have seen the RM1s on Guam when they wanted to find out
 results
 as to who made chief.
 Grab the orderwire to Hono.  Ask for a patch to San Diego.  Ask for a
 patch
 to Washington ....
 Had the results in 15 minutes LOL 
)
 73 from Rochester, NY
 Jim AA2QA