TOUCHSTONE.
"...I did dislike the cut of a certain courtier's beard;
he sent me word, if I said his beard was not cut well,
he was in the mind it was.
This is call'd the Retort Courteous.

"If I sent him word again it was not well cut,
he would send me word he cut it to please himself.
This is call'd the Quip Modest.

"If again it was not well cut, he disabled my judgment.
This is call'd the Reply Churlish.

"If again it was not well cut, he would answer I spake not true.
This is call'd the Reproof Valiant.

"If again it was not well cut, he would say I lie.
This is call'd the Countercheck Quarrelsome.

"And so to the Lie Circumstantial

"and the Lie Direct."

JAQUES.
"And how oft did you say his beard was not well cut?"

TOUCHSTONE.
"I durst go no further than the Lie Circumstantial,
nor he durst not give me the Lie Direct;
and so we measur'd swords and parted."

JAQUES.
"Can you nominate in order now the degrees of the lie?"

TOUCHSTONE.
"O, sir, we quarrel in print by the book, as you have books for
good manners. I will name you the degrees.

"The first, the Retort Courteous;
the second, the Quip Modest;
the third, the Reply Churlish;
the fourth, the Reproof Valiant;
the fifth, the Countercheck Quarrelsome;
the sixth, the Lie with Circumstance;
the seventh, the Lie Direct.

"All these you may avoid but the Lie Direct; and you may avoid
that too with an If. I knew when seven justices could not take up
a quarrel; but when the parties were met themselves, one of them
thought but of an If, as:
'If you said so, then I said so.'
And they shook hands, and swore brothers.

"Your If is the only peace-maker; much virtue in If."

"As You Like It," Bill Shakespeare

73's
Richard Clark, KB7QHC