On Thursday, March 17, 2016 at 9:32:26 AM UTC-5, fred k engles wrote:
FOR THIS PERFORMANCE TO HAVE A DEEP, LASTING EFFECT YOU SHOULD
PLAY A RECORDING OF CAT STEVENS' "ANOTHER SATURDAY NIGHT" DURING
YOUR VIEWING EXPERIENCE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION.

STEP 1. OBTAIN A PIG. THIS ONE WILL DO:

_____
^..^ \9
(oo)_____/
WW WW Pig

STEP 2. FIND A STURDY TOILET

_
| |
___| |
( .'
)__( Toilet

STEP 3. SHOVE THE PIG INTO THE TOILET HEAD-FIRST. HE WILL
NOT FIT. DO THE BEST YOU CAN. WE DO NOT HAVE A GRAPHIC FOR
STEP THREE SO WE PRESENT A MOUSE INSTEAD:

o..o
(\/)S Mouse

JUST IMAGINE THE PIG STUCK FACE-FIRST IN THE TOILET. THE
MOUSE IS OF NO MATTER.

STEP 4. **** THE PIG IN THE ASS. HIS SHARP TEETH, FIELD OF
VISION AND ABILITY TO FIGHT BACK WILL BE RESTRAINED *AS LONG
AS YOU HAVE STUFFED THE PIG PROPERLY INTO THE TOILET*. ****
THAT PIG. YEAH, **** IT. JESUS CHRIST THE PIG DOESN'T LIKE
THIS DEAL AT ALL AND THAT'S WHAT YOU GET OFF ON BABY. ****
THAT LITTLE PIG. MMMMMM YEAH FINISHING MMMM PIG IN TOILET MMM

STEP 5. EVENTUALLY THE PIG WILL DROWN, GET "****ED-OUT" AND
COLLAPSE IN ON ITSELF OR OTHERWISE CEASE TO CONTINUE
PERFORMING AS ****TOY. REPLACE WITH FRESH PIG. SEE STEP 1.

You know how to give a cat a bath?