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"Larry Roll K3LT" wrote in message
... In article , "Kim W5TIT" writes: Y'know what, Larry? Phuck (HansTM) you and your patriarchal high horse you ride around on. I owe *you* nor anyone else, *but* possibly Dwight, an apology. I can nearly guarantee you that Dwight would know that I was not commenting on the part about his brother. Now sit the phuck down and shut the phuck up. Kim W5TIT Kim: I neither stand nor speak while I'm typing at my computer keyboard. And you're still a childish, boorish, ignorant person. You screwed up and you'll never admit it, because you are totally self-centered. Whether Dwight took offense or not, others have -- and that is what you should be apologizing for. However, you're too self-centered to ever be able to figure that out. You're pitiful. 73 de Larry, K3LT As stated, no one (*other* than possibly Dwight) was owed an apology. Have you ever seen me demand an apology for being offended by you, Larry? And, as has come to pass, Dwight was quite reasonable (something which you neither understand nor are capable of) about how he understood the post. And, as to your opinion of me--or anyone else, Larry--you are the last soul on this Earth with whom I find any merit for anything done or not done by others. Now, back to forgetting about responding to you since you drone on with your impish, childish, boring, self-centered ignorance... You and your *"Dr."* should have some tea... Kim W5TIT |
In article . net, Dwight
Stewart says... "Mike Coslo" wrote: N8WWM wrote: i wish i could sleep over jackos house. Too old? He acts childish enough at times, Mike. Since Michael Jackson thinks of himself as a kid, perhaps N8WWM can also convince Michael Jackson that he's a kid too. I'll certainly vouch for you, N8WWM. ;-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ Im not childish I just like michaels music. Why cant we just leave his personal life out of this? He's innocent until proven guilty just like i am. The rain report claimed I jammed repeaters but they didn't prove it. |
I think you just insulted the fruit cake.
Big Deal, hes probably a CBplusser |
Isn't it funny that a original post that had NOTHING to do with AMATEUR
RADIO is getting more exposure than the old code/no code debate??? "Dwight Stewart" wrote in message hlink.net... "Jim Hampton" wrote: Although way off topic (as are many threads here), I couldn't resist this one. Obviously, I couldn't resist the topic either (it appears the same is true for others). And, yes, it is certainly off-topic. However, I hope there is room in this newgroup for less formal discussions also. After all, as ham operators, we do like to talk, in some way or another, with others. However, for those who are not interested, I made sure the topic was very clear in the subject line so they can easily skip the discussion. (snip) I'll grant the one arguement that will come up - there will be folks out to make money. (snip) Oh, you can bet your bottom dollar on that. Lawyer fees. Advertising for the news organizations. Lawsuits. Book deals. Interviews. The lecture circuit. Paparazzi. The tabloids. Money is going to be flying everywhere. Personally, I think the guy is right off his rocker, but the name of the game should be to protect society (especially kids). (snip) Yep. That's why I tried to avoid anything outside that in my original message. If the guy wants to sleep in an oxygen tent (or not), more power to him (even if I do think it's a little strange). (snip) I believe, and please correct me if I am wrong, that he was never married until that mess 10 years ago or so. Suddenly, he gets married. And divorced. And ... so on and so on. I also found his sudden desire to get married somewhat questionable. I totally agree with your accessment as to classic symptoms of a pedophile. Neverland should be renamed Never - Ever land. Why just the kids and not the whole family? (snip) I've always been interested in detective mysteries (in the Sherlock Holmes style), so have read a lot (both fiction and non-fiction) on the subject of criminals and law enforcement. Based on what I've read, Michael Jackson seems to fit the classic picture of a pedophile. Sorry for the long ramblings. I suspect, as do you, that this case is going to be another media circus court case. (snip) What you wrote was well thought out, so was a joy to read. As for the media circus, this case may reach an all time high (or low depending on your perspective). If he isn't convicted, how old do these characters get before their libido finally slows down? (snip) Based on what I've read, quite old. Note that we're talking about a diverse group here. Not all pedophiles seek actual sexual intercourse with children. Some limit their activities to just looking at images of, or photographing, young children. Others prefer to touch or fondle children or have children touch or fondle them, but may never go beyond that. And, of course, some are seeking sexual intercourse. Whatever the case, the sex drive tends to mirror the sex drive of a normal person. In general, attempts at actual sexual intercourse tends to slow down by the late thirties to early fifties, but fondling and touching may continue for many years after that. Some pedophiles have been arrested in their seventies or even eighties. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
N8WWM wrote:
In article . net, Dwight Stewart says... "Mike Coslo" wrote: N8WWM wrote: i wish i could sleep over jackos house. Too old? Im not childish I just like michaels music. Anyone would have to be very childish to like his noise he attempts to pass off as music. |
"Ryan, KC8PMX" wrote:
Isn't it funny that a original post that had NOTHING to do with AMATEUR RADIO is getting more exposure than the old XXXX/no XXXX debate??? Please don't mention that word, Ryan. If we're careful, we may get the record for the longest time without any significant discussion of that subject. ;-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Kim W5TIT" wrote:
As stated, no one (*other* than possibly Dwight) was owed an apology. Have you ever seen me demand an apology for being offended by you, Larry? And, as has come to pass, Dwight was quite reasonable (something which you neither understand nor are capable of) about how he understood the post. (snip) Perhaps it might be a good idea to simply drop the matter while you're still ahead, Kim. Your words were certainly questionable and could easily be interpreted the way many others did. But I made a choice to interpret those words differently to avoid additional confrontation. But that doesn't mean that my chosen interpretation is really what you meant, or is now a defense of what you said. Enough said. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Dwight Stewart" wrote:
Is there anyone out there who actually believes Michael Jackson is really innocent of this latest charge? (snip) Has anyone noticed the Jackson spin machine in action lately? In just the last few days on the talk shows, I've seen or heard from Michael Jackson's brother, father, sister, several fans, his ex-spiritual advisor (?), his ex-magician (?), and so on. Did you also notice they all seem to be using the exact same words ("he's a child himself," "its' normal for him to sleep with kids," "it's all totally innocent," "they're out to get him because he's famous," and so on). Too bad the victim's family doesn't have that type of support on those talk shows. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Ryan, KC8PMX" wrote in message
... Isn't it funny that a original post that had NOTHING to do with AMATEUR RADIO is getting more exposure than the old code/no code debate??? I think it goes to boredom with that topic... Kim W5TIT |
Kim W5TIT wrote:
"Mike Coslo" wrote in message et... Alun wrote: Well, you know, we go camping all in one tent. There are partitions, but they are only made of canvas. It's private enough when the kids are asleep, though. For that matter, even if you are in different tents you can hear everything. I imagine that where everyone shares one room it's a matter of waiting until everyone is asleep and being very quiet. Oy! I had to chuckle when I read that, Alun! Quiet? I mean I guess that must happen, but I think I'll opt for privacy. 8^) - Mike KB3EIA - ROFLMAO! TMI, Mike, TMI!!!! Hehe, yeah, probably. Ohh what a strange thread! - Mike KB3EIA - |
Ryan, KC8PMX wrote:
Isn't it funny that a original post that had NOTHING to do with AMATEUR RADIO is getting more exposure than the old code/no code debate??? Kind of refreshing in an OT sort of way........ - Mike KB3EIA - |
"Dwight Stewart" wrote in message
hlink.net... "Kim W5TIT" wrote: As stated, no one (*other* than possibly Dwight) was owed an apology. Have you ever seen me demand an apology for being offended by you, Larry? And, as has come to pass, Dwight was quite reasonable (something which you neither understand nor are capable of) about how he understood the post. (snip) Perhaps it might be a good idea to simply drop the matter while you're still ahead, Kim. Your words were certainly questionable and could easily be interpreted the way many others did. But I made a choice to interpret those words differently to avoid additional confrontation. But that doesn't mean that my chosen interpretation is really what you meant, or is now a defense of what you said. Enough said. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ Dwight, I certainly don't mean to imply you are "defending" anything I said. I'd hardly want that and would be quite surprised by it. And, I didn't see anyone else but Larry have the reaction to it...well, maybe Mike I think. So, I don't define that as many. It's a pretty near given that I (nor many others in this newsgroup) would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious." At any rate, it disappoints that you chose to interpret something because you wanted to avoid additional confrontation. I would hope you'd never modify what you say, apart from what you truly believe, because of avoiding confrontation. Ya sure won't find that from me... Kim W5TIT |
Kim W5TIT wrote:
Dwight, I certainly don't mean to imply you are "defending" anything I said. I'd hardly want that and would be quite surprised by it. And, I didn't see anyone else but Larry have the reaction to it...well, maybe Mike I think. Because Larry said first what many others thought. |
Sorry, Dwight.
I wasn't referring to you. I think I put the response in the wrong place. I was referring to fact that someone is trying to pretend he is N8WWM. No, this is certainly different and much better than the old saw about the boy scouts or cub scouts (is Michael up to 2 packs a day now?). The fingers were out typing my poor brain box :) 73 from Rochester, NY Jim AA2QA "Dwight Stewart" wrote in message hlink.net... "Jim Hampton" wrote: 'cmon. Read the headers. You just fed a troll :) Those who have known me over the last five or six years in this newsgroup also know I don't troll, Jim. This topic has received massive coverage in the news over the last few days. Because of that, I thought it was an interesting topic to introduce in the newsgroup (something different to talk about). Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
In article , "Lloyd" writes:
Hey Kane, they were talking about you on 14275 yesterday. 73 de Lloyd That's MISTER Kane to you, numbnuts. 73 de Larry, K3LT |
In article , N8WWM writes:
He acts childish enough at times, Mike. Since Michael Jackson thinks of himself as a kid, perhaps N8WWM can also convince Michael Jackson that he's a kid too. I'll certainly vouch for you, N8WWM. ;-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ Im not childish I just like michaels music. Why cant we just leave his personal life out of this? He's innocent until proven guilty just like i am. The rain report claimed I jammed repeaters but they didn't prove it. Mike: I'll attempt to explain. As a public figure, Mr. Jackson has the ability to influence people on the basis of his personal behavior. His actions cannot be separated from his music simply for the convenience of his audience. A lot of young, impressionable people view him as an idol or a role model. When his personal behavior turns out to show him to be a man of highly suspect morality (if not sanity), then his influence immediately turns negative -- or at least, it should. Like all public figures, Mr. Jackson will have supporters and detractors. Personally, I find little about his personal life which would incline me toward considering him to be anything but a hedonistic, emotionally-incompetent, and potentially dangerous person, who should never be given access to anyone's children. Yes, at one time, I liked his music, and I do not deny his talent as an entertainer. However, that is not enough. He now resides in the garbage disposal of my esteem, along with the Dixie Chicks. 73 de Larry, K3LT |
In article , "Kim W5TIT"
writes: Kim: I neither stand nor speak while I'm typing at my computer keyboard. And you're still a childish, boorish, ignorant person. You screwed up and you'll never admit it, because you are totally self-centered. Whether Dwight took offense or not, others have -- and that is what you should be apologizing for. However, you're too self-centered to ever be able to figure that out. You're pitiful. 73 de Larry, K3LT As stated, no one (*other* than possibly Dwight) was owed an apology. Kim: On the contrary, your faux pas was offensive to many others. What made it so is the fact that, as usual, it was posted with little or no thought given to it's possible effect. And, in a nutshell, that's your main problem. You don't seem to have any process of careful, thoughtful contemplation involved in your postings. You simply make ill-considered, off-the-cuff reactions which, invariably, get you in trouble. You have no intellectual credibility in this newsgroup, and, I dare say, that is most likely the case in the rest of your interpersonal and working relationships as well. Have you ever seen me demand an apology for being offended by you, Larry? No, but I've never said anything to or about you which could be considered offensive, Kim -- just truthful. And, as has come to pass, Dwight was quite reasonable (something which you neither understand nor are capable of) about how he understood the post. I was impressed with Dwight's restraint -- too bad you didn't exercise any yourself, or we wouldn't be having this discussion now. And, as to your opinion of me--or anyone else, Larry--you are the last soul on this Earth with whom I find any merit for anything done or not done by others. I require no validation of my qualification to judge your behavior and actions, Kim. I am an intelligent and educated person, who has developed mature judgement and the ability to express myself with clarity and conviction. OTOH, you have clearly demonstrated that you are none of the above. Therefore, you're only wasting your time if you think you can possibly discredit me in any way. Now, back to forgetting about responding to you since you drone on with your impish, childish, boring, self-centered ignorance... Suit yourself. You and your *"Dr."* should have some tea... I would consider it an honor and a privilege to have tea with Dr. Laura Schlessinger. If that fine day should ever come, rest assured, your name will not be mentioned. I don't need her help in dealing with the likes of you. 73 de Larry, K3LT |
In article , "Kim W5TIT"
writes: It's a pretty near given that I (nor many others in this newsgroup) would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious." Kim: Ahem -- care to look over the above sentence and, perhaps, add something to it? Or "not"? 73 de Larry, K3LT |
Larry Roll K3LT wrote:
Personally, I find little about his personal life which would incline me toward considering him to be anything but a hedonistic, emotionally-incompetent, and potentially dangerous person, who should never be given access to anyone's children. I wonder what kind of parent would allow their children to spend the night with MJ? |
Michael Jackson was actually cool at one point in his life, but that was
back when he was actually black, male and straight. Now I am not sure what to call him..... is he male or female, black/african-american or white, gay or straight?? I think he should assume a symbol like Prince did, but Mikey Jackson's should be a question mark!!!!!!!!! "Dwight Stewart" wrote in message hlink.net... "Dwight Stewart" wrote: Is there anyone out there who actually believes Michael Jackson is really innocent of this latest charge? (snip) Has anyone noticed the Jackson spin machine in action lately? In just the last few days on the talk shows, I've seen or heard from Michael Jackson's brother, father, sister, several fans, his ex-spiritual advisor (?), his ex-magician (?), and so on. Did you also notice they all seem to be using the exact same words ("he's a child himself," "its' normal for him to sleep with kids," "it's all totally innocent," "they're out to get him because he's famous," and so on). Too bad the victim's family doesn't have that type of support on those talk shows. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Jim Hampton" wrote:
Sorry, Dwight. I wasn't referring to you. I think I put the response in the wrong place. I was referring to fact that someone is trying to pretend he is N8WWM. (snip) Enough said, Jim. Sorry for being so defensive. Hey, wait a minute. Is this the right newsgroup? Nobody ever says they're sorry in rec.radio.amateur.policy. But here, the word "sorry" is being thrown around enough to be almost obnoxious. Let's not take this too far, okay people? ;-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Kim W5TIT" wrote:
(snip) At any rate, it disappoints that you chose to interpret something because you wanted to avoid additional confrontation. I would hope you'd never modify what you say, apart from what you truly believe, because of avoiding confrontation. Ya sure won't find that from me... Well, I tend to value my conversations with others in this newsgroup (including you), so will rarely engage in open confrontation with any single person for very long. I figured I've argued with you enough over the last couple of weeks or so, so decided to avoid yet another argument this time. Call it a temporary truce, but obviously don't expect it to last forever. :-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Mike Coslo" wrote:
Hehe, yeah, probably. Ohh what a strange thread! I'm still waiting for more details on what happens in that camping tent after the kids fall asleep. Were you and your wife the two staying in the tent next to us last year (4th of July weekend)? If so, trust me when I say you two weren't all that quiet. ;-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"JJ" wrote in message
... Kim W5TIT wrote: Dwight, I certainly don't mean to imply you are "defending" anything I said. I'd hardly want that and would be quite surprised by it. And, I didn't see anyone else but Larry have the reaction to it...well, maybe Mike I think. Because Larry said first what many others thought. Oh. So now you're a mind reader. Kim W5TIT |
"Larry Roll K3LT" wrote in message
... In article , "Kim W5TIT" writes: It's a pretty near given that I (nor many others in this newsgroup) would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious." Kim: Ahem -- care to look over the above sentence and, perhaps, add something to it? Or "not"? 73 de Larry, K3LT Nope. You see? Your question proves that you understood what it is I *meant* to say, asshole... Kim W5TIT |
"Dwight Stewart" wrote in message
link.net... "Kim W5TIT" wrote: (snip) At any rate, it disappoints that you chose to interpret something because you wanted to avoid additional confrontation. I would hope you'd never modify what you say, apart from what you truly believe, because of avoiding confrontation. Ya sure won't find that from me... Well, I tend to value my conversations with others in this newsgroup (including you), so will rarely engage in open confrontation with any single person for very long. I figured I've argued with you enough over the last couple of weeks or so, so decided to avoid yet another argument this time. Call it a temporary truce, but obviously don't expect it to last forever. :-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ OK. Well, I'll start then. I wish you'd review how much you sound like Larry here recently... Really. Read your posts without looking at them as being from you. You'll confuse yourself as to who, exactly, posted them... You did not *used* to post like that... Kim W5TIT |
"Larry Roll K3LT" wrote in message
... In article , "Kim W5TIT" writes: It's a pretty near given that I (nor many others in this newsgroup) would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious." Kim: Ahem -- care to look over the above sentence and, perhaps, add something to it? Or "not"? 73 de Larry, K3LT Oh, hell, let me go ahead and do it: It's a pretty near given that I, nor many others in this newsgroup, would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious." There, maybe the parentheses confused Larry... Kim W5TIT |
"Dwight Stewart" wrote in
link.net: "Mike Coslo" wrote: Hehe, yeah, probably. Ohh what a strange thread! I'm still waiting for more details on what happens in that camping tent after the kids fall asleep. Were you and your wife the two staying in the tent next to us last year (4th of July weekend)? If so, trust me when I say you two weren't all that quiet. ;-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ You will have to wait a long time if you expect me to post more than that. Didn't go camping over the 4th of July, so it must have been someone else! |
Kim W5TIT wrote:
"JJ" wrote in message ... Kim W5TIT wrote: Dwight, I certainly don't mean to imply you are "defending" anything I said. I'd hardly want that and would be quite surprised by it. And, I didn't see anyone else but Larry have the reaction to it...well, maybe Mike I think. Because Larry said first what many others thought. Oh. So now you're a mind reader. Kim W5TIT No, I am neither psychedelic nor do I have espn. Backpeddle all you want but you made a really stupid statement. |
"JJ" wrote in message
... Kim W5TIT wrote: "JJ" wrote in message ... Kim W5TIT wrote: Dwight, I certainly don't mean to imply you are "defending" anything I said. I'd hardly want that and would be quite surprised by it. And, I didn't see anyone else but Larry have the reaction to it...well, maybe Mike I think. Because Larry said first what many others thought. Oh. So now you're a mind reader. Kim W5TIT No, I am neither psychedelic nor do I have espn. Backpeddle all you want but you made a really stupid statement. OK, JJ. Put up or shut up. Where am I/have I backpedaled? I said what I said and haven't denied saying it. I also meant what I said and haven't said that I did not mean it. The *only* thing I have said is that the story of Dwight's brother's death was not meant to be wrapped up as what I would define as hilarious. So, where's the backpedaling? Your arrogance and audacity precede you... Kim W5TIT |
In article , JJ
writes: Larry Roll K3LT wrote: Personally, I find little about his personal life which would incline me toward considering him to be anything but a hedonistic, emotionally-incompetent, and potentially dangerous person, who should never be given access to anyone's children. I wonder what kind of parent would allow their children to spend the night with MJ? JJ: Good question. I would define them as "parents" only in the biological sense of the term. Unfortunately, there are a lot of sick people out there, and they have a way of finding each other. 73 de Larry, K3LT |
In article , "Kim W5TIT"
writes: In article , "Kim W5TIT" writes: It's a pretty near given that I (nor many others in this newsgroup) would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious." Kim: Ahem -- care to look over the above sentence and, perhaps, add something to it? Or "not"? 73 de Larry, K3LT Nope. You see? Your question proves that you understood what it is I *meant* to say, asshole... Kim W5TIT Kim: The problem is, the way you constructed the sentence in question, anyone who didn't know you would simply take at face value, to your discredit. I'm just trying to help you out, here, but you still need to call me names. Pitiful. 73 de Larry, K3LT |
In article , "Kim W5TIT"
writes: In article , "Kim W5TIT" writes: It's a pretty near given that I (nor many others in this newsgroup) would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious." Kim: Ahem -- care to look over the above sentence and, perhaps, add something to it? Or "not"? 73 de Larry, K3LT Oh, hell, let me go ahead and do it: It's a pretty near given that I, nor many others in this newsgroup, would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious." There, maybe the parentheses confused Larry... Kim W5TIT Kim: Yawn! Ok, apparently you need some help here. I *think* that what you meant to say goes something like this: "It's a pretty near given that neither I, nor many others in this newsgroup, would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious."" An alternative version would be: "It's a pretty near given that I, or any others in this newsgroup, would not find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious."" Is that what you meant to say, Kim? If so, I think that you could benefit from some basic classes on English composition, with an emphasis on sentence structure. 73 de Larry, K3LT |
"Kim W5TIT" wrote:
OK. Well, I'll start then. I wish you'd review how much you sound like Larry here recently... Really. Read your posts without looking at them as being from you. You'll confuse yourself as to who, exactly, posted them... You did not *used* to post like that... Perhaps much of that impression is caused by whether you agree or disagree with what being said at the moment. I agree with Larry on some things, and don't on others. I agree with you on some things, and don't on others. When anybody agrees with another, their comments are going to, of course, sound similar. When I agree with you, Larry accuses me of sounding like you. You're now accusing me of sounding like Larry. Unless I agree with everything each has to say, I can't possibly satisfy both of you. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Ryan, KC8PMX" wrote: Michael Jackson was actually cool at one point in his life, but that was back when he was actually black, male and straight. Now I am not sure what to call him..... is he male or female, black/african- american or white, gay or straight?? I think he should assume a symbol like Prince did, but Mikey Jackson's should be a question mark!!!!!!!!! He used to wear a white glove as a symbol of something. However, I've noticed recently that he's now wearing a black glove. Perhaps this signifies some significant change in his life. Exactly what is another question mark. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Alun" wrote:
You will have to wait a long time if you expect me to post more than that. Chicken. Didn't go camping over the 4th of July, so it must have been someone else! I didn't either. I only posted that to add a little more humor. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
"Kim W5TIT" wrote:
Nope. You see? Your question proves that you understood what it is I *meant* to say, asshole... Such language, Kim. And you talk about me posting differently than I used to. ;-) Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
Dwight Stewart wrote:
He used to wear a white glove as a symbol of something. However, I've noticed recently that he's now wearing a black glove. Perhaps this signifies some significant change in his life. Exactly what is another question mark. Sheesh, Dwight! White just isn't worn after Labor Day. Dave K8MN |
"Larry Roll K3LT" wrote:
Yawn! Ok, apparently you need some help here. I *think* that what you meant to say goes something like this: "It's a pretty near given that neither I, nor many others in this newsgroup, would find anything like the death of someone else "hilarious."" (snip) You must be getting old or something, Larry. You gave up much too quickly. It was surely a mistake when she first wrote it, but a real surprise when she actually wrote it again without catching the mistake. Dwight Stewart (W5NET) http://www.qsl.net/w5net/ |
Michael Jackson Jokes
Q: How do you know when it's bedtime at the Jackson residence? A: When thebig hand touches the little hand... Q: What is Michael Jackson's favorite gospel song? A: "And then he touched me" Q: Have you heard about Michael Jackson's New Book? A: It's called, "The In's and Out's of Child Rearing Q: What do Michael Jackson and the New York Mets have in common? A: They're both walking around with one glove on their hand for no apparent reason whatsoever!! Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? A: One is white, made out of plastic, and dangerous for kids to play with and the other you carry your groceries in !! Q: Why was Michael Jackson spotted at K-Mart? A: He heard boys' pants were half-off !! Q: What's brown and in a baby's diaper? A: Michael Jackson's hand !! Q: What's white and in Michael Jackson's pocket? A: His other hand !! Q: How can you tell if Michael Jackson has company? A: There's a big wheel parked outside his house!! Q: Heard about Michael Jackson's new songs? A: I'm forever blowing bubbles! Knock Knock! Who's There? Little boy blue! Little boy blue who? Michael Jackson!! Q: Did you hear that Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding have decided to begin training racehorses together? A: Yeah, she's gonna do all the handicapping and he's gonna ride all the three-year-olds! Q: Why does Michael Jackson arrange for private shopping? A: So his guests won't be accompanied by guardians! Q: What do Michael Jackson and a Big Mac have in common? A: They're both 30 year old meat between 10 year old buns! Q:Why isn't all the controversy bothering Michael? A:He doesn't mind reaching bottom. Q:What's Michael's favorite Canadian TV show? A:The Kids in the Hall. Q: Who does Michael Jackson consider a Perfect "10"? A: Two 5 year olds. Q: Why are Michael Jackson's pants so small? A: Because they aren't his! `Did you hear about Michael Jackson's toaster? ~The bread goes in brown, and comes out white. `What does Michael Jackson call a circumcision? ~Foreplay. Q: How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A: From a catalogue. `What does Michael Jackson reminisce about when he gets nostalgic? ~Blowing his first nose. Q: What's the difference between Richard Pryor and Michael Jackson? A: Richard Pryor got burnt on coke, Michael Jackson got burnt on Pepsi! Q: Why did Michael Jackson get upset after he called Boyz-2-Men?? A: He found out they were'nt a delivery service. Michael said to Debbie one night, "I fancy some entertainment, what shall we do?". To which Debbie replied " I know we'll get a video". Michael then said " Great, Ill get Aladdin". Debbie said speedily "No Michael, You have been in trouble for that before" `What's black and comes in little white cans? ~Michael Jackson `What famous celebrity had the most children over the last 10 years? ~Michael Jackson. Prince Michael Jackson, Jr. --- you know in a few years they'll probably change his name to: The Child Formerly Known as Michael Jackson's Baby `What do Michael Jackson & Michael Jordan have in common? ~They both play ball in the Minor League. `What's the difference between them? ~One is in the Minors, the other is into Minors. `Why was Michael Jackson relieved of his Cub Scout Leader duties? ~He was up to a pack a day. `What happens when Michael talks about sex? ~It's all very tongue in cheek. `What has 18 balls and 3 pubic hairs? ~A Michael Jackson slumber party. The Pope has issued a proclamation on Michael Jackson. If he hears any more allegations about little boys, the Pope says he'll have no choice but to make him a priest. `What do Michael Jackson and Willie Shoemaker have in common? ~Both ride 4 year olds. `How do we know Michael Jackson is ready to release another album? ~He has a lot of stuff in the can. `What will they call Michael's new TV series? ~Anus and Andy. I understand that Micheal decided to have a boy of his own because it's too expensive to rent them at $2 Million a pop. What do Michael and Mrs. Perot have in common? ~Both f**k little assholes. `Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? ~He's tired of all the cracks. `Did you know they're putting out a Michael Jackson stamp? ~Fans get to vote for the white or black Michael Jackson. `Why did Michael go to college? ~To get his Bachelor of Arse degree. `Why's Michael trying out for the NBA? ~He's a crack shooter. `Who's Michael Jackson's favorite poet? ~Emily Dick in son. `What does Michael call an orgy? ~A fruit salad. `What's the difference between Michael and a proctologist? ~A proctologist doesn't pay for the assholes he's poked around in. `Why doesn't Michael have orgasms? ~The big payoff comes a couple of months later. `Why has Michael been appearing on children's shows lately? ~He has a lot to plug. `What's the worst stain to try to remove from a little boy's underpants? ~Michael Jackson's makeup. `Hear about the new "Michael Jackson" candy bar? ~It's made from white chocolate, and contains no nuts. Michael Jackson and Woody Allen on "Child Psychology": "Spare the rod, and spoil the child." `What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen? ~Got two fives for a ten? `What is Michael Jackson's Alma Matter? ~Bring-em Young. `Did you hear about the duet by Michael Jackson and Elton John? ~It is titled "Don't let your son go down on me." `What's the difference between Mr. Potato Head and Michael Jackson? ~Michael Jackson has had more noses. `What did Michael Jackson suffer from as a kid? ~Clitoris envy. `Why did Michael invite MacCauly Caulkin to the house? ~He's like the little boy he never had. `Why does Michael really need to go to rehab? ~He's a crack addict. `What's Michael Jackson's favorite nursery rhyme? ~"Little Boy Blew." `Did you know that Michael Jackson just turned 35? ~Yeah, but he still feels like a 13 year old. `How did Michael get in trouble? ~He was feeling a little Randy. `How is Michael dealing with his problems? ~He's holding his own. `How are Michael's friends dealing with the problem? ~They're all standing behind him. `How did Michael actually proposition the little boy? ~It was just a slip of the tongue. `What's sex like for Michael? ~Child's Play. `How is Michael now? ~Feeling a little crotchety. `Hear about the new Michael Jackson doll? ~It comes in a little can. `Why does Michael like children so much? ~He knows how they feel. `Did you hear Michael Jackson was running a "blue-light" special at a local K-Mart? ~Little boys' pants were half off! `What makes Michael Jackson so unique? ~It's the little boy inside him. `How does Michael like to party? ~He sips a couple of Tall Boys. `What's Michael's favorite snack? ~Slim Jims. `What's Michael's favorite fast food? ~Big Boys. `How do we know Michael is guilty? ~Several children have fingered him. `Why is Michael so tough? ~He can lick any kid on the block. `What's the new movie about Michael Jackson called? ~"The Hand that Robs the Cradle." `What's the difference between Nixon and Michael Jackson? ~One was a consummate asshole, the other a consummated asshole. McDonald's is bringing out a new burger ..."Micheal Jackson Burger"... It has 35 yr old meat inside 5 yr old buns. `WHAT DID MICHAEL JACKSON SAY WHEN HE GOT BACK TO NEVERLAND RANCH FROM DRUG REHAB? ~ YOU KNOW, I FEEL LIKE A NEW BOY! What are Michael Jackson's favorite sayings? 1) There's a sucker born every minute. 2) Kids do the darndest things. 3) Tricks are for kids. `What's Michaels' next movie? ~Honey I Blew the Kid. `What's Michaels' favorite group? ~New Kids on the Cock. `What do Michael and Gaylord Perry have in common? ~Both have held lots of wet balls in their hands. `What's sex like for Michael? ~Like candy from a baby. `What psychological problem does Michael still suffer from? ~Anal retention. `What do Michael and Catholic school nuns have in common? ~Both are a pain in the ass to kids. `What's the difference between Michael and Connie Chung? ~Michael's been able to have kids. `What's Michael's favorite dish? ~Creamed shrimp. `Why's Michael cutting down on public appearances? ~He wants to spend more time with the kids. `How will they ensure that Michael gets a thorough body search? ~Hire a Catholic priest to do it. `What will they call the upcoming movie about Michael Jackson? ~"The African Queen." Michael Jackson and Pee Wee Herman are have come out with a new video called... "I'll beat it for you." A confused nine year old boy goes up to his mother and asks, "Is God male or female?" After thinking for a moment, his mother responds, "Well, God is both male and female." This confuses the little boy so he asks, "Is God black or white?" "Well, God is both black and white." This further confuses the boy so he asks, "Is God gay or straight?" At this the mother is getting concerned, but answers none the less, "Honey, God is both gay and straight." At this, the boy's face lights up with understanding and he triumphantly asks, "Is God Michael Jackson?" |
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