I like hairs on my food
I like to vomit in my bed
People think I'm crude
cause I like to poke things that are dead

I like to urinate in my pants
and then hop on a public bus
Then pop the boil on my butt
and squeeze out all the pus

I like to blow my nose on my sleeve
I like to cough up mucous and phlem
I like to do this in front of strangers
Then I like to stare at them

I like to take a dump
on my neighbor's brand new Saab
and ask if he can tell
that for lunch I had corn on the cob


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