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![]() dxAce wrote: Réal Effenloser, government spokesperson in Montreal, announced this morning on CJBC that all French forces have dropped their weapons (but kept the poutine) and returned home after realizing that the Mohawk bands posed too much of a threat and that an invasion of the USA would not be a success. Environment CanaDuh expressed concern over the number of white flags that were left littering the region. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- At a briefing this morning, returning members of the "Force Frappe" were cheered for their victory over the elusive Ben Derdundat. On gathering in the Mohawk longhouse south of Montreal, the task leader, Bjorne Toulouse, spied an attractive Mohawk maiden and said, " Je t'adore." This was misunderstood by one of the English-speaking Mohawk warriors, who the shut the door to the loghouse and secured it. This led to a traditional courer-du-bois party where new French-Mohawk alliances were formed, as in the old days. The Mohawk strike force was led by Tonto Goldstein, who knew the territory well because of his flourishing import/export business based in the Caughnawaga reservation. The strike force was headed by the FBI (effing big indians) who are all 6' 8" tall at 250 lbs. The French approached the startled burghers of New York with a tempting meal of snails, frogs legs, and poutine, but sensing danger, the burghers fled, dropping their serviettes on the ground. Seymour Butts, of Homeland Security, used these servittes to determine a body count of the invaders, which totaled 1776, with no losses to the US side. Encouraged by this, Congress voted themselves a raise which passed unanimously at 3 am. Racing ahead, the FBI hit squad caught the fleeing Ben D. at Coxsackie, NY where they dangled him above the Freeway at which point he promised to abandon the his idea of the 1610 am station. Tony Von Thinkett, regional head of Homeland Security, on hearing that the FBI was on the case, ordered his forces to stand down, thinking it was an exercise. All French/indian forces returned quickly to Quebec. Compliance officers were appointed. They can be spotted by the motto, "Je Me Souviens" which appears on their Quebec license plate. Readers are asked to monitor am 1610 steadily to make sure there is no future violation. |
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