Judge: Dougay "Foodstamp" Adair, you are charged with evading child support.
How do you plead?

Dougay: Not guilty your honor.

Judge: So your paying support, is that what your trying to tell me?

Dougay: No, I don't pay my support, but I have a no code ham license.

Judge: What does that have to do with paying child support?

Dougay: As a no code tech, I am compelled to stop keyclowns from using the
freeband.

Judge: I still don't see the connection. Why aren't you paying you child
support?

Dougay: I'm a licensed ham. Don't you recognize my importance in this world?
Without me the keyqueenz will just talk on the freebands any time they wish.

Judge: No, I don't. Shouldn't the FCC be taking care of this?

Dougay: As a ham I am the FCC.

Judge: So how much does the FCC pay you?

Dougay: Nothing. It's my duty as a ham.

Judge: Your duty is to your children.

Dougay: I don't think you see the importance of having a ham license. I'm
special, not everyone can get a ham license. I do important things.

Judge: I sentence you to 3 years in prison.

Dougay: I see what's happening, Steveo has gotten to you. There is some sort
of keyclown conspiracy going on here.

Judge: Bailiff take him away.

Two bailiffs grab Dougay and drag him out of the court room kicking and
screaming.

Dougay: YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!!! I'M A LICENSED HAM!!! I AM ABOVE THE
LAW!!!