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Blast from the past...
I must admit, I did do a nice job of satirizing the AKC membership, did I
not? Yes, I wrote it. I admit it. BFD! Original text, messups and all: The whole story, up to now.. (Knock at the door) Aaron opens door wearing his skimpiest thong underwear Aaron: Hi Sparky! How are you! Sparky: I'm good Aaron. Is dinner ready? Aaron: Almost. In the meantime, you can snack on me, but we need to hurrybefore George gets here. Sparkyscreaming) Aaron! Will you shut up with the advances! I already toldyou I've started to like women now! Now leave me alone! Aaron: OK, OK! I just thought we could be like the old days again. Sparky: No, I'm really going to stick it out this time. Aaron: (sniffling) Ok Sparky, have it your way. I'll respect your wishes. Sparky: Where's George? Do we have to wait for him to eat? Aaron: Yes, he's bringing the salad. Sparky: OK. Got any snacks? Aaron: I think so, let me check. (knock at the door)Aaron answers the door. Aaronexclaiming) George! My God! What happened to you? Georgecrying) I was just out minding my own business, following this littlegirl, and all the sudden, wham! Her Dad must have seen me and punched me. I hadjust asked if she wanted some candy too. I think I could have had her. Then theDad pulled out of the window of my Pacer, and beat me some more. I think hedislocated my shoulder too. Sparky: Can we eat now? Aaron: Sparky, can't you see George is hurt? Go get one of the steaks forGeorge's black eyes. And while you're in the kitchen Sparky, get some ice forhis broken nose and busted lip too. Sparky: OK, but I ain't eating the steak that you use on George's eyes! Aaron: OK, whatever! (Sparky spends fully 5 minutes trying to figure out which steak is thesmallest, so he can have the biggest.then finally he returns) Aaron: God Sparky! Why did you take a bite out of it? It's raw, for Christ'ssake! Sparkyunintelligible mumbling caused by mouthful of raw steak) Aarongrabs steak from Sparky and applies it to George's eyes) There nowGeorge. Is that better? Aaron knows how to make you feel better, doesn't he? George: Yes Aaron, it's much better now. Thanks, you know I bruise easily. Aaron: Hey Sparky, light the grill. Sparky: Hey, those steaks ain't half bad raw! Do we really need to cook them? Aaron: My God Sparky! Sometimes you act like a Neanderthal! Light the damngrill! (Sparky goes out back, turns on the gas, clicks the igniter repeatedly, nothinghappens. Goes back inside for matches and returns) Aaronjust as Sparky lights the match) NO! STOP! (loud explosion) Sparky: (screaming) I'm on fire! Somebody help me! (Sparky runs back through the house with his beard on fire, screaming for help.Aaron and George race behind him with teacups filled with water) To Be Continued Finally, Aaron and George manage to catch Sparky and beat out the fire inSparky's beard with the teacups. Sparky: Thanks guys! That was close! I saw my life flash before my eyes. Aaron: No prob Sparky. You know we love you. George: Speak for yourself, Aaron! Faggot! Sparky: Can we eat now? George: Well, we could if you hadn't blown up the grill! Aaron: It's OK Sparky. We'll just grill the steaks on the stove. Sparky: I don't wanna wait! I'm getting dizzy. My cholesterol must have droppedbelow 300. George: Here, drink this. Sparky: What is it? George: Bacon drippings. It will bring the cholesterol level back up in yourblood. Sparkydrinks greedily) Burp! Thanks George. George: No problem. Hey Aaron, you still have that "Little Girls Gone Wild"video? Aaron: I think so.check over there in the gay porn by the VCR. George: Faggot! (looks for the tape) Sparky: I'm hungry! Let's eat. Aaron: Just hang on a minute. Let me get these damn steaks cooked. (throws thesteaks in the pan) George: (tearing his eyes off the video) Sparky, get the salad and dressingready, will ya? I'm busy now. Sparky: OK, George. (Sparky sets the table) Aaron: How do you guys like your steaks? Sparky: Raw is fine with me. George: (rubbing his crotch while watching the little girl video) I don't care.Yeah, raw is fine with me too. Aaron: (mumbles) Damn weirdo's. Aaron: (grease splatters on Aaron's hairless chest) Ouch! George: Aaron, do you mind if I take this video home with me? Aaron: Sure, take it. You know I don't like females. George: (under his breath) Faggot! Sparky: Can we eat now? Aaron: Yep! Steaks are done. (Aaron places them on the table) Sparky: I'm first George! That's my steak! George: Whatever Sparky! Hell, I'm just gonna leave now. (grabs the video andheads for the door) Aaron: Where you going, George? George: Um.uh.I'm not really hungry now. I think I'll just watch this tapeat home. Sparky: Good! Gimme his steak. Aaron: OK George, see ya later. George: Bye To be continued.. Scene: Much later in the evening after George has gone home to watch his kiddyporn, we return to find Aaron and Sparky enmeshed in each other's arms. Aaron: Sparky, I knew you would come around. Sparky: Well Aaron, I kind of feel guilty.almost as if I'm slipping back intomy old self. I've really tried to kick this man habit, but I can't seem to stophaving feelings for you. Aaron: Well Sparky, I always knew we were meant for each other. Sparky: I only ask one thing of you, Aaron. Aaron: What might that be, Sparky? Sparky: All I ask is that you don't breath a word of this encounter to George. Aaron: Fair enough. I know he's a bit of a bigot. Sparky: Yes he is, but he's still my only real friend. You know, I can't countthe times that he's tried to save me when I've gotten in over my head on thenewsgroup. Aaron: I know Sparky, and he's done the same for me. I really love him, but Ican't let him know that. Sparky: So, we're sworn to secrecy, right Aaron? Aaron: Absolutely! Remember, we did take the AKC pledge. Sparkychuckles quietly) Sparky: (tentatively) OK Aaron, I'm all yours. Scene: Fade to black. |
#2
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"Randy" wrote:
I must admit, I did do a nice job of satirizing the AKC membership, did I not? Yes, I wrote it. I admit it. BFD! DOH! -- Japanese Nascar? http://tinyurl.com/3apbj |
#3
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"Duke Of Windsor" wrote in message ... "Randy" wrote in : From: Randy ) Subject: Dinner at Aaron's View: Complete Thread (10 articles) Original Format Newsgroups: rec.radio.cb Date: 2002-04-28 21:04:35 PST "Dweebo Spanka" wrote in message ... (Knock at the door) Aaron opens door wearing his skimpiest thong underwear Aaron: Hi Sparky! How are you! Sparky: I'm good Aaron. Is dinner ready? Aaron: Almost. In the meantime, you can snack on me, but we need to hurry before George gets here. Sparkyscreaming) Aaron! Will you shut up with the advances! I already told you I've started to like women now! Now leave me alone! Aaron: OK, OK! I just thought we could be like the old days again. Sparky: No, I'm really going to stick it out this time. Aaron: (sniffling) Ok Sparky, have it your way. I'll respect your wishes. Sparky: Where's George? Do we have to wait for him to eat? Aaron: Yes, he's bringing the salad. Sparky: OK. Got any snacks? Aaron: I think so, let me check. (knock at the door)Aaron answers the door. Aaronexclaiming) George! My God! What happened to you? Georgecrying) I was just out minding my own business, following this little girl, and all the sudden, wham! Her Dad must have seen me and punched me. I had just asked if she wanted some candy too. I think I could have had her. Then the Dad pulled out of the window of my Pacer, and beat me some more. I think he dislocated my shoulder too. Sparky: Can we eat now? Aaron: Sparky, can't you see George is hurt? Go get one of the steaks for George's black eyes. And while you're in the kitchen Sparky, get some ice for his broken nose and busted lip too. Sparky: OK, but I ain't eating the steak that you use on George's eyes! Aaron: OK, whatever! (Sparky spends fully 5 minutes trying to figure out which steak is the smallest, so he can have the biggest.then finally he returns) Aaron: God Sparky! Why did you take a bite out of it? It's raw, for Christ's sake! Sparkyunintelligible mumbling caused by mouthful of raw steak) Aarongrabs steak from Sparky and applies it to George's eyes) There now George. Is that better? Aaron knows how to make you feel better, doesn't he? George: Yes Aaron, it's much better now. Thanks, you know I bruise easily. Aaron: Hey Sparky, light the grill. Sparky: Hey, those steaks ain't half bad raw! Do we really need to cook them? Aaron: My God Sparky! Sometimes you act like a Neanderthal! Light the damn grill! (Sparky goes out back, turns on the gas, clicks the igniter repeatedly, nothing happens. Goes back inside for matches and returns) Aaronjust as Sparky lights the match) NO! STOP! (loud explosion) Sparky: (screaming) I'm on fire! Somebody help me! (Sparky runs back through the house with his beard on fire, screaming for help. Aaron and George race behind him with teacups filled with water) To Be Continued Funny! I can almost picture it happening! I must admit, I did do a nice job of satirizing the AKC membership, did I not? Yes, I wrote it. I admit it. BFD! And you even reply to your own posts ROFLMAO........ From: Randy ) Subject: Dinner at Aaron's View: Complete Thread (10 articles) Original Format Newsgroups: rec.radio.cb Date: 2002-04-28 21:04:35 PST "Dweebo Spanka" wrote in message ... (Knock at the door) Aaron opens door wearing his skimpiest thong underwear Aaron: Hi Sparky! How are you! Sparky: I'm good Aaron. Is dinner ready? Aaron: Almost. In the meantime, you can snack on me, but we need to hurry before George gets here. Sparkyscreaming) Aaron! Will you shut up with the advances! I already told you I've started to like women now! Now leave me alone! Aaron: OK, OK! I just thought we could be like the old days again. Sparky: No, I'm really going to stick it out this time. Aaron: (sniffling) Ok Sparky, have it your way. I'll respect your wishes. Sparky: Where's George? Do we have to wait for him to eat? Aaron: Yes, he's bringing the salad. Sparky: OK. Got any snacks? Aaron: I think so, let me check. (knock at the door)Aaron answers the door. Aaronexclaiming) George! My God! What happened to you? Georgecrying) I was just out minding my own business, following this little girl, and all the sudden, wham! Her Dad must have seen me and punched me. I had just asked if she wanted some candy too. I think I could have had her. Then the Dad pulled out of the window of my Pacer, and beat me some more. I think he dislocated my shoulder too. Sparky: Can we eat now? Aaron: Sparky, can't you see George is hurt? Go get one of the steaks for George's black eyes. And while you're in the kitchen Sparky, get some ice for his broken nose and busted lip too. Sparky: OK, but I ain't eating the steak that you use on George's eyes! Aaron: OK, whatever! (Sparky spends fully 5 minutes trying to figure out which steak is the smallest, so he can have the biggest.then finally he returns) Aaron: God Sparky! Why did you take a bite out of it? It's raw, for Christ's sake! Sparkyunintelligible mumbling caused by mouthful of raw steak) Aarongrabs steak from Sparky and applies it to George's eyes) There now George. Is that better? Aaron knows how to make you feel better, doesn't he? George: Yes Aaron, it's much better now. Thanks, you know I bruise easily. Aaron: Hey Sparky, light the grill. Sparky: Hey, those steaks ain't half bad raw! Do we really need to cook them? Aaron: My God Sparky! Sometimes you act like a Neanderthal! Light the damn grill! (Sparky goes out back, turns on the gas, clicks the igniter repeatedly, nothing happens. Goes back inside for matches and returns) Aaronjust as Sparky lights the match) NO! STOP! (loud explosion) Sparky: (screaming) I'm on fire! Somebody help me! (Sparky runs back through the house with his beard on fire, screaming for help. Aaron and George race behind him with teacups filled with water) To Be Continued Funny! I can almost picture it happening! Appears I ****ed someone off. Oh well, you only found out when I admitted it. AKC intelligence must be an oxymoron. |
#4
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"Must Be a Bad batch! HUH" wrote in message ... "Randy" wrote in : "Duke Of Windsor" wrote in message ... "Randy" wrote in : From: Randy ) Subject: Dinner at Aaron's View: Complete Thread (10 articles) Original Format Newsgroups: rec.radio.cb Date: 2002-04-28 21:04:35 PST "Dweebo Spanka" wrote in message ... (Knock at the door) Aaron opens door wearing his skimpiest thong underwear Aaron: Hi Sparky! How are you! Sparky: I'm good Aaron. Is dinner ready? Aaron: Almost. In the meantime, you can snack on me, but we need to hurry before George gets here. Sparkyscreaming) Aaron! Will you shut up with the advances! I already told you I've started to like women now! Now leave me alone! Aaron: OK, OK! I just thought we could be like the old days again. Sparky: No, I'm really going to stick it out this time. Aaron: (sniffling) Ok Sparky, have it your way. I'll respect your wishes. Sparky: Where's George? Do we have to wait for him to eat? Aaron: Yes, he's bringing the salad. Sparky: OK. Got any snacks? Aaron: I think so, let me check. (knock at the door)Aaron answers the door. Aaronexclaiming) George! My God! What happened to you? Georgecrying) I was just out minding my own business, following this little girl, and all the sudden, wham! Her Dad must have seen me and punched me. I had just asked if she wanted some candy too. I think I could have had her. Then the Dad pulled out of the window of my Pacer, and beat me some more. I think he dislocated my shoulder too. Sparky: Can we eat now? Aaron: Sparky, can't you see George is hurt? Go get one of the steaks for George's black eyes. And while you're in the kitchen Sparky, get some ice for his broken nose and busted lip too. Sparky: OK, but I ain't eating the steak that you use on George's eyes! Aaron: OK, whatever! (Sparky spends fully 5 minutes trying to figure out which steak is the smallest, so he can have the biggest.then finally he returns) Aaron: God Sparky! Why did you take a bite out of it? It's raw, for Christ's sake! Sparkyunintelligible mumbling caused by mouthful of raw steak) Aarongrabs steak from Sparky and applies it to George's eyes) There now George. Is that better? Aaron knows how to make you feel better, doesn't he? George: Yes Aaron, it's much better now. Thanks, you know I bruise easily. Aaron: Hey Sparky, light the grill. Sparky: Hey, those steaks ain't half bad raw! Do we really need to cook them? Aaron: My God Sparky! Sometimes you act like a Neanderthal! Light the damn grill! (Sparky goes out back, turns on the gas, clicks the igniter repeatedly, nothing happens. Goes back inside for matches and returns) Aaronjust as Sparky lights the match) NO! STOP! (loud explosion) Sparky: (screaming) I'm on fire! Somebody help me! (Sparky runs back through the house with his beard on fire, screaming for help. Aaron and George race behind him with teacups filled with water) To Be Continued Funny! I can almost picture it happening! I must admit, I did do a nice job of satirizing the AKC membership, did I not? Yes, I wrote it. I admit it. BFD! And you even reply to your own posts ROFLMAO........ From: Randy ) Subject: Dinner at Aaron's View: Complete Thread (10 articles) Original Format Newsgroups: rec.radio.cb Date: 2002-04-28 21:04:35 PST "Dweebo Spanka" wrote in message ... (Knock at the door) Aaron opens door wearing his skimpiest thong underwear Aaron: Hi Sparky! How are you! Sparky: I'm good Aaron. Is dinner ready? Aaron: Almost. In the meantime, you can snack on me, but we need to hurry before George gets here. Sparkyscreaming) Aaron! Will you shut up with the advances! I already told you I've started to like women now! Now leave me alone! Aaron: OK, OK! I just thought we could be like the old days again. Sparky: No, I'm really going to stick it out this time. Aaron: (sniffling) Ok Sparky, have it your way. I'll respect your wishes. Sparky: Where's George? Do we have to wait for him to eat? Aaron: Yes, he's bringing the salad. Sparky: OK. Got any snacks? Aaron: I think so, let me check. (knock at the door)Aaron answers the door. Aaronexclaiming) George! My God! What happened to you? Georgecrying) I was just out minding my own business, following this little girl, and all the sudden, wham! Her Dad must have seen me and punched me. I had just asked if she wanted some candy too. I think I could have had her. Then the Dad pulled out of the window of my Pacer, and beat me some more. I think he dislocated my shoulder too. Sparky: Can we eat now? Aaron: Sparky, can't you see George is hurt? Go get one of the steaks for George's black eyes. And while you're in the kitchen Sparky, get some ice for his broken nose and busted lip too. Sparky: OK, but I ain't eating the steak that you use on George's eyes! Aaron: OK, whatever! (Sparky spends fully 5 minutes trying to figure out which steak is the smallest, so he can have the biggest.then finally he returns) Aaron: God Sparky! Why did you take a bite out of it? It's raw, for Christ's sake! Sparkyunintelligible mumbling caused by mouthful of raw steak) Aarongrabs steak from Sparky and applies it to George's eyes) There now George. Is that better? Aaron knows how to make you feel better, doesn't he? George: Yes Aaron, it's much better now. Thanks, you know I bruise easily. Aaron: Hey Sparky, light the grill. Sparky: Hey, those steaks ain't half bad raw! Do we really need to cook them? Aaron: My God Sparky! Sometimes you act like a Neanderthal! Light the damn grill! (Sparky goes out back, turns on the gas, clicks the igniter repeatedly, nothing happens. Goes back inside for matches and returns) Aaronjust as Sparky lights the match) NO! STOP! (loud explosion) Sparky: (screaming) I'm on fire! Somebody help me! (Sparky runs back through the house with his beard on fire, screaming for help. Aaron and George race behind him with teacups filled with water) To Be Continued Funny! I can almost picture it happening! Appears I ****ed someone off. Oh well, you only found out when I admitted it. AKC intelligence must be an oxymoron. Randy your turn check google, we know you have trolled this group and still do under different accounts and names. You are very impotent though especially with all your internet skillz. The only moron is you Whatever... |
#5
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"Must Be a Bad batch! HUH" wrote in message ... "Randy" wrote in : "Duke Of Windsor" wrote in message ... "Randy" wrote in : From: Randy ) Subject: Dinner at Aaron's View: Complete Thread (10 articles) Original Format Newsgroups: rec.radio.cb Date: 2002-04-28 21:04:35 PST "Dweebo Spanka" wrote in message ... (Knock at the door) Aaron opens door wearing his skimpiest thong underwear Aaron: Hi Sparky! How are you! Sparky: I'm good Aaron. Is dinner ready? Aaron: Almost. In the meantime, you can snack on me, but we need to hurry before George gets here. Sparkyscreaming) Aaron! Will you shut up with the advances! I already told you I've started to like women now! Now leave me alone! Aaron: OK, OK! I just thought we could be like the old days again. Sparky: No, I'm really going to stick it out this time. Aaron: (sniffling) Ok Sparky, have it your way. I'll respect your wishes. Sparky: Where's George? Do we have to wait for him to eat? Aaron: Yes, he's bringing the salad. Sparky: OK. Got any snacks? Aaron: I think so, let me check. (knock at the door)Aaron answers the door. Aaronexclaiming) George! My God! What happened to you? Georgecrying) I was just out minding my own business, following this little girl, and all the sudden, wham! Her Dad must have seen me and punched me. I had just asked if she wanted some candy too. I think I could have had her. Then the Dad pulled out of the window of my Pacer, and beat me some more. I think he dislocated my shoulder too. Sparky: Can we eat now? Aaron: Sparky, can't you see George is hurt? Go get one of the steaks for George's black eyes. And while you're in the kitchen Sparky, get some ice for his broken nose and busted lip too. Sparky: OK, but I ain't eating the steak that you use on George's eyes! Aaron: OK, whatever! (Sparky spends fully 5 minutes trying to figure out which steak is the smallest, so he can have the biggest.then finally he returns) Aaron: God Sparky! Why did you take a bite out of it? It's raw, for Christ's sake! Sparkyunintelligible mumbling caused by mouthful of raw steak) Aarongrabs steak from Sparky and applies it to George's eyes) There now George. Is that better? Aaron knows how to make you feel better, doesn't he? George: Yes Aaron, it's much better now. Thanks, you know I bruise easily. Aaron: Hey Sparky, light the grill. Sparky: Hey, those steaks ain't half bad raw! Do we really need to cook them? Aaron: My God Sparky! Sometimes you act like a Neanderthal! Light the damn grill! (Sparky goes out back, turns on the gas, clicks the igniter repeatedly, nothing happens. Goes back inside for matches and returns) Aaronjust as Sparky lights the match) NO! STOP! (loud explosion) Sparky: (screaming) I'm on fire! Somebody help me! (Sparky runs back through the house with his beard on fire, screaming for help. Aaron and George race behind him with teacups filled with water) To Be Continued Funny! I can almost picture it happening! I must admit, I did do a nice job of satirizing the AKC membership, did I not? Yes, I wrote it. I admit it. BFD! And you even reply to your own posts ROFLMAO........ From: Randy ) Subject: Dinner at Aaron's View: Complete Thread (10 articles) Original Format Newsgroups: rec.radio.cb Date: 2002-04-28 21:04:35 PST "Dweebo Spanka" wrote in message ... (Knock at the door) Aaron opens door wearing his skimpiest thong underwear Aaron: Hi Sparky! How are you! Sparky: I'm good Aaron. Is dinner ready? Aaron: Almost. In the meantime, you can snack on me, but we need to hurry before George gets here. Sparkyscreaming) Aaron! Will you shut up with the advances! I already told you I've started to like women now! Now leave me alone! Aaron: OK, OK! I just thought we could be like the old days again. Sparky: No, I'm really going to stick it out this time. Aaron: (sniffling) Ok Sparky, have it your way. I'll respect your wishes. Sparky: Where's George? Do we have to wait for him to eat? Aaron: Yes, he's bringing the salad. Sparky: OK. Got any snacks? Aaron: I think so, let me check. (knock at the door)Aaron answers the door. Aaronexclaiming) George! My God! What happened to you? Georgecrying) I was just out minding my own business, following this little girl, and all the sudden, wham! Her Dad must have seen me and punched me. I had just asked if she wanted some candy too. I think I could have had her. Then the Dad pulled out of the window of my Pacer, and beat me some more. I think he dislocated my shoulder too. Sparky: Can we eat now? Aaron: Sparky, can't you see George is hurt? Go get one of the steaks for George's black eyes. And while you're in the kitchen Sparky, get some ice for his broken nose and busted lip too. Sparky: OK, but I ain't eating the steak that you use on George's eyes! Aaron: OK, whatever! (Sparky spends fully 5 minutes trying to figure out which steak is the smallest, so he can have the biggest.then finally he returns) Aaron: God Sparky! Why did you take a bite out of it? It's raw, for Christ's sake! Sparkyunintelligible mumbling caused by mouthful of raw steak) Aarongrabs steak from Sparky and applies it to George's eyes) There now George. Is that better? Aaron knows how to make you feel better, doesn't he? George: Yes Aaron, it's much better now. Thanks, you know I bruise easily. Aaron: Hey Sparky, light the grill. Sparky: Hey, those steaks ain't half bad raw! Do we really need to cook them? Aaron: My God Sparky! Sometimes you act like a Neanderthal! Light the damn grill! (Sparky goes out back, turns on the gas, clicks the igniter repeatedly, nothing happens. Goes back inside for matches and returns) Aaronjust as Sparky lights the match) NO! STOP! (loud explosion) Sparky: (screaming) I'm on fire! Somebody help me! (Sparky runs back through the house with his beard on fire, screaming for help. Aaron and George race behind him with teacups filled with water) To Be Continued Funny! I can almost picture it happening! Appears I ****ed someone off. Oh well, you only found out when I admitted it. AKC intelligence must be an oxymoron. Randy your turn check google, we know you have trolled this group and still do under different accounts and names. You are very impotent though especially with all your internet skillz. The only moron is you Was pretty funny tho, huh? LOL |
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