The fantastic "How to implant a control chip in YOUR pet keyclown"
website!

Make your pet keyclown do all these things...

1. Sign you up for spam
2. Say nasty stuff in the NG
3. Make threats
4. Obsessively google your name over and over.
5. Cry because he discovers you are heterosexual

These and many more...The chip is 100% owner programmmable from the
convenience of your Home PC. Your pet keyclown will do what you want
immediately after his chip sends the instruction to his peanut brain.

The AKC has perfected this technology and it is 100% foolproof. It has
to be foolproof so a keyclown can't remove it, since keyclowns are
fools.

GET YOUR "TOTAL COMMAND AND CONTROL OF YOUR PET KEYCLOWN" Chip today,
from your leader in AKC Technology...AKC Laboratories.

NOTE: Some keyclowns are so stupid that they do not even need the
chip...look back on your keyclown pet candidate's last 100 or so NG
posts, you may not even need the chip!