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Old August 19th 06, 08:16 AM posted to,alt.usenet.kooks,,,alt.culture.alaska
external usenet poster
First recorded activity by RadioBanter: Aug 2006
Posts: 19
Default PING AUK OT Just How Wrong IS Ward Hardman. Not as wrong as the Doofus of Masturbation.

I was busily flonking away in alt.usenet.kooks, when The Goddess Eris
Herself suddenly made me reply to Ward Hardmanu
FreeSpeechStore wrote:

Outing personal info in subject lines, no matter who gave you
"permission" is k00ky. How the **** do you know that the real Ward
Hardman directed you to it? How do you know that it wasn't a personal,
real-life enemy of his, making a cowardly attempt to get some other
k00k to harass Ward?

Duh! Maybe everyone on usenet is really JFK. Maybe there is no Ward

Not the point. You have no ****ing idea if anyone is who they say they
are, on usenet -- that's the whole point of /posting/ to usenet --
anonymity. Legalnames and nicknames, they're all the same here, because
no one can prove anything (without delving into private ISP records). So
outing personal info is the same as telling anyone who might ever have a
grudge against your victim exactly how to stalk them (in addition to
being a cowardly means of getting back at someone you don't like, for
whatever reason). That makes you an accessory before the fact, if anything
ever happens to Ward, so you better pray nothing ever does happen, asswipe.

Anyway, subnormal underage fellator of livestock, I haven't outed
personal info in subject lines, except when reproducing subject lines when

So you're a willing accomplice to outing. Scum. Filth.

I have no idea what you're farting about. Are you a Star Trek nut lost
in cyberspace?

We(tinw) the kookologists and kook-hunters of alt.usenet.kooks make a
practice of seeking out and diagnosing net.k00ks, and you are now one of
our subjects.

I still have no idea what you're farting about. Are you a scientologist on
acid? Why do you crosspost to alaska and mj?

Scientologists are k00ks. Their entire religion is based on a pack of
lies, backed up by various means of intimidation, as with Xianity, Islam,
and Judaism -- so no, we're not them. We(tinw) analyse k00ks such as
yourself, and when we(tinw) decide that a given k00k is worthy of
recognition, we(tinw) hand out awards to them, such as Kook of the Month,
Clueless Newbie otM, Coward otM, the Golden Killfile, and many others.
Here's a portion of the FAQ:



1. What is this newsgroup, alt.usenet.kooks (AUK)?

A mass of electrons spread out upon bandwidth scattered across the globe
for the express purpose of separating the wheat from the chaff of the

2. This is a joke, right? RIGHT?!!

No more a joke than the fact that ISPs let people on every day who have
nothing better to do than annoy their neighbors enough to win by popular
vote silly little awards created for just such buffoons as them.

3. What's this newsgroup for?

The newsgroup alt.usenet.kooks is for the discovery and discussion of
Kooks on Usenet and the Internet. These people are known technically as

4. What's this newsgroup NOT for?

This group exists for recreational Kookology, not for Very Personal
Vendetta. It is not to be used for general harassment of someone, or for
net abuse such as spamming and flooding and cancelbombing in an attempt
to gain vengeance on someone or get the denizens of AUK to shut up.
Either way, it won't work, it's very messy, "Bob" will give you triple
your money back, and you don't get a life.

Also, we [tinw] are not in the business of harassing the vulnerable or
the insane. Occasionally an apparent net.kook proves to be genuinely
ill. In such cases the person is disqualified from winning awards and
other posters are asked to avoid exarcerbating his or her problems.
Similarly, trolling or kook-hunting in support groups is strongly

5. Who let this newsgroup in here, and why wasn't I notified?

That's what you get for hogging the Beer Fund.

(Here you can view the control message that started it all, from our
Mighty Founder MAC.)

6. Who is a net.kook?

If you post uniquely strange, preferably incomprehensible articles, or
you manifest a persistent, extreme, and somewhat bizarre obsession, you
just might be a net.kook. And more.

It is important to note the subtle distinction between a net.kook, a
net.cretin, a clueless newbie, troll, or garden-variety @$$hole. The
newbie, one hopes, can acquire a clue on the installment plan even if he
can't afford to buy one for cash; the cretin is merely stupid and/or
irritating; the troll makes a fool out of himself by making a fool out
of you, the @$$hole is, well, simply that. But a TRUE net.kook has a
special fascination derived from his/her/its utter ineffability. Their
behavior is irrational, if not downright weird, but they are seldom
merely boring.

It is not considered appropriate to nominate clueless newbies, trolls,
or longwinded spambrains as net.kooks. It is acceptable to nominate
net.cretins, or simply to present them, without nomination, for whatever
minor amusement value they may have; but the real focus here is on
net.kooks in all their raging, indomitable glory.

Important Disclaimer: the fact that someone has been proclaimed a
net.kook does not imply any psychological diagnosis in and of itself. A
net.kook may or may not be clinically insane; that is not the concern of
the AUK audience.

We hope.

7. Can you show me a few examples?

I'd rather not, but it may help to clarify things... The person who
posted a handful of meaningless, ill-formed newgroup messages on May 21,
1994 was a Clueless Newbie. The person who hung around
alt.religion.kibology during April and May 1994, constantly posting
boilerplate "warning" messages telling people that ARK messages were
intentionally meaningless, was a net.cretin. The people who post
demented "scientific" theories, like Archimedes Plutonium's concept of
the universe being one giant atom of plutonium, and seem incorrigible to
criticism, are moderate net.kooks. The sort of being who constantly
raves about the conspiracy against her/him/it is an extreme net.kook,
especially if he/she/it automatically assumes that anyone who questions
their world-view is an agent of the conspirators or is an ultra
right-wing/left-wing extremist, and hides behind an anonymous remailer
to avoid "persecution" even though they would get one hell of a lot less
of it by not posting at all.

8. How do I present a Kook on this group?

The preferred technique is to get the suspected Kook to start posting to
AUK so that we can all see him/her/it in all their first-hand Glory. You
can do this by posting followups to the suspect's weirder messages, with
your followups nonchalantly crossposted to AUK. If the suspect responds
to your messages without editing the Newsgroups line, you've achieved
your goal.

Another acceptable method is to repost, complete and unedited, one or
two of the suspected Kook's recent rants. If you do this, please provide
a brief intro in the header describing what the hell you're doing, such
as indicating who this person is, what group you found the message on,
or why you think the rest of us should give a rat's @$$ about it.

You should be aware that if you try this with some perfectly reasonable
posting, you may be flamed to net.hell and back and probably suspected
of being a net.loon yourself. It is also considered extremely lame to
nominate someone as a Kook simply because you have lost, or at least
failed to win, a debate with them; persistently doing so is likely to
get you nominated for Kook Awards. That someone fails to perceive the
self-evident, unassailable wisdom of your viewpoint does not, in and of
itself, constitute Kookery.

9. What are the Kook Awards?

The newsgroup alt.usenet.kooks offers a variety of widely-recognized and
highly dubious honors for your service, applying to net.kooks
everywhere. They recognize several kinds and many levels of net.kookery.

Here is a detailed list of AUK awards and descriptions.

10. Who the FSCK appointed YOU net.kookologist/god/nazi etc.

Nobody. We have a Gift.


Incidentally, IIRC, the ones who started the x-poasting were not in fact
kook-hunters from AUK, but the likes of you yourself and your buddy,
"James", though ICBW. Not that it's important -- analysing kooks is what
we(tinw) here at AlcaTroll Labs /do/, and whether a k00k chooses to post
here on his own or is tricked into it, we don't really care. Either way,
you hace been brought to our(tino) attention, and we won't ever forget
about you for long. Ever.

__________________________________________________ _______
Hail Eris! All hail Discordia!! Kallisti!!! mhm 29x21
Pope Snarky Goodfella of the undulating cable, JM,
Email popesnarky *at*
I want a boyfriend who is sensitive and caring,
but they already have boyfriends.

  #2   Report Post  
Old August 20th 06, 12:06 AM posted to,alt.usenet.kooks,,,
external usenet poster
First recorded activity by RadioBanter: Aug 2006
Posts: 57
Default Moronic Outer Filth K00ks from rmcr sure suck fat ass. Ward F Hardman, Jr, Age: 59 (born 1946), Outing Filth snecked

On Sat, 19 Aug 2006 12:00:53 -0700, fha.jonkers wrote:
Lola Stonewall Riot schreef:

Then, of course, consider that the x-poasting of the threads outing Ward
Hardman /began/ in rmcr, and no one forced you guys to x-poast here. Now
that you _are_ x-poasting to AUK, however, we(tinw) are highly inclined
to return the favour for the next decade or so, perhaps longer, because
it seems your group is a motherlode of k00ks, meaning we(tinw) are
interested in it. You might have considered investigating before
x-poasting here, honestly -- we(tinw) won't stop.

Mind if I remind you of something? The "you guys" you are mentioning is no
more than one troll with various accounts who has been spamming rmcr for a
long time with his nonsense -- most people have him killfiled. What you
are doing now, however, is "punishing" an entire (and relatively placid)
group of 100+ subscribers for the actions of a troll that you seem to
dislike as much as the whole rmcr group does. Doesn't that seem a little

Isn't life a BITCH? Plus, the alleged multi-nym Google troll insists that
he is, in fact, two different persons, and you sound like you might be
another nym of the same k00k-torll, using better vocabulary. We(tinw)
must investigate further, to see if the entire group is in favour of
outing personal info, has "looked the other way" and given tacit
passive support, or what.

__________________________________________________ ________________________
Hail Eris!
Not Richard Scoville
Rookie Kook of the Year, 2005
Kook of the Month, December 2005
Clueless Newbie of the Month, October 2005
Palmjob Paddle, January 2006
George Pickett Memorial Trophy, October 2005
Coward of the Month, October 2005
George Armstrong Custer "Kicked @$$" Award
Kenny McCormick Memorial Medal
Order of the Holey Sockpuppet
Balsa Gavel
Richard M. Scoville is explicitly denied the right to archive any of my
posts, under any of my nyms, on his site,, winner of
the Memorial Award for Kooksite of the Year, 2005
"It's claiming authority based on absurd myths and fantasy beings - that
creates anger." -- Kurt Gavin

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